


Throw Me In The Deep End, Watch Me Drown

by Ninyaaaaaaah



Series: If All Is Fair In Love & War, I Can't Do This Anymore [8]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, BDSM, Butt Plugs, Cock Ring, Dom/sub, Face Slapping, Face-Fucking, Gags, M/M, Oral Sex, PWP, Paddle, Rope Bondage, Rough Sex, Sex Toys, Smut, Spanking, Threesome - M/M/M, Verbal Humiliation, safe words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2017-09-21
Packaged: 2019-01-03 20:26:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12154161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninyaaaaaaah/pseuds/Ninyaaaaaaah
Summary: Laf and John introduce Alex to the world of BDSM





	Throw Me In The Deep End, Watch Me Drown

John came home _shaking_.

That was the first thing Alex noticed. 

He looked up from where he was curled on the couch in the sitting room as John passed, whole body tense, whole body trembling, something charged in every lean line of muscle. 

Beside him, Lafayette straightened. 

John reappeared a moment later, slinking past the doorway, that tension still tight beneath the surface.

“John Laurens.”

Lafayette’s voice like a cracking whip. 

Alex froze. 

John froze. 

“Where are you going?” Lafayette stood up, authority in every line of his body. 

Alex looked between them, John frozen in the doorway looking like he’d been caught red handed doing something he shouldn’t, and Lafayette… something dangerous simmering just beneath the surface of him. 

Made Alex want to hold his breath. 

“Out,” John replied. Petulant. 

“Hardly. Turn around, get your ass upstairs and get the bed ready, you’re going nowhere,” Lafayette commanded. He stalked towards John, and John squared his shoulders, glared up at Lafayette.

For a moment, nothing happened. 

“Go. Upstairs. I will be up shortly and I expect you to be ready. I need to speak with Alexander first,” Lafayette cupped John’s cheek in his hand, the soft gesture so at odds with the hard lines of their bodies, the sharp tone of their voices. 

John softened a touch, glanced over at Alex, their eyes meeting for a moment. Swallowed hard, and nodded. 

“Okay.”

“Good boy,” Lafayette murmured. Low, soft. 

Alex felt like he was seeing something he shouldn’t see. Something he did not quite understand. 

John padded back down the hall the way he’d come, and Lafayette watched him go for a long moment before turning to Alex.

“We must discuss something, Starlight,” he said as he walked back over to the couch, sat down and turned to face Alex, arm up on the back of the couch. 

“Okay…” Alex closed his book and shifted to face Lafayette, curiosity peaked. 

“When John feels like he does, when he wants to go out seeking intoxication and a fist fight, there are sometimes other, safer ways to give him what he’s craving. So that he doesn’t end up nearly dead in an alley. So that he really gets the relief he’s seeking, not just a mediocre scratch to the surface itching. Now that you are here… I would like you to be a part of this as well. If you are comfortable,” Lafayette was watching Alex closely, voice soft, body language soft, so different from how he’d been with John only moments earlier. 

“Okay… so, what is it?” Alex asked, head tilting slightly to the side. 

“Have you ever explored the roles of dominance and submission during sex? No? Alright. It can be very liberating, to give oneself up to a partner. To have your pleasure, and your pain, controlled by someone else,” Lafayette talked as breezily as if he was discussing the weather. 

Alex chewed his lower lip, considering.

“So… what do you actually do?” He asked, mulling the idea over in his head.

“It varies. Sometimes I will tie him up, sometimes not. I could gag him with something, or blindfold him, or both. Make him wear a cock cuff so that he cannot come, or a plug in his ass, or both. He likes the riding crop. Slapping. Choking,” Lafayette listed these things off on his fingertips like he was making a grocery list, and Alex’s eyes grew wider and wider.

“You’d- you’d- why would you want to choke him!?” He spluttered. 

Lafayette grinned. 

“Because, it feels good. Besides, there are safety measures in place. If John needs to pause, discuss something, change course, or take a moment for whatever reason, his word is ‘steady’. If he needs to stop immediately and not continue, his word is ‘whoa’. If I would like to check in with him, I say ‘check’, and if he is fine, he says ‘canter’,” Lafayette shifted a little, placed his hand on Alex’s knee, leaned in. 

“He’s not a horse,” Alex crinkled his nose.

“He said the same thing. I wanted him to have words that he would remember even in moments of extreme physical and emotional distress,” Lafayette countered. 

Alex studied Lafayette’s face, his calm demeanor, his relaxed body. Turned the idea over in his head. Thought about what it might feel like to have Lafayette or John do those things to him… 

Felt a little thrill of fear, little thrill of curiosity. 

“But still… hitting? Choking?” He crinkled his nose again. Just couldn’t picture it. 

Lafayette grinned, savage, and leaned in further. Brought the hand on Alex’s knee up to Alex’s neck and closed his fingers loosely. 

Alex’s eyes widened, but he didn’t move, held spell bound, the weight of Lafayette’s hand around his neck sending a thrill through his body. Danger. Trust. Anticipation. 

Lafayette squeezed, ever so gently. 

“Check?” He breathed, leaning in a little more, mouth near Alex’s mouth, gaze fixed steady and intense on Alex’s face. 

“Canter,” Alex breathed back, heartbeat fluttering in his throat. 

Lafayette let him go. Leaned in and kissed him, slow and deep. 

Alex didn’t know if he was relieved, or disappointed, but he thought maybe, just maybe, he could understand. 

“Okay. So now what?” Alex was keenly aware that John hadn’t come back down stairs again. 

“Now, we go tend to John. You may watch, or partake, as much as you feel like you want to. If you are in the room, you are participating, and may use any one of the safewords at any time as well. Even if you only spectate. These things can become very emotionally intense, so please, if you need to stop or pause at any time, use the safewords. That is what they are there for.” Lafayette stood up and offered Alex his hand. 

Alex took it, let Lafayette pull him to his feet. 

“So, if John has listened, the bed will be stripped and he will be waiting naked in the center of it, sitting on his heels,” Lafayette explained as he padded up the sweeping staircase, Alex at his side. 

Alex nodded, felt nervous, heart fluttering in his throat, even though nothing was happening to him. 

He entered the bedroom behind Lafayette, the charged atmosphere in the room stealing the breath from his lungs. Quietly, he shut the door, and stayed near it, taking in the scene before him. 

The bedding was stripped from the bed, everything save the fitted sheet, all folded neatly in the corner. 

In the center of the bed, John sat, pretty as a picture, hands in his lap, legs tucked neatly beneath him, his hair pulled back in a tight braid. The perfect picture of submission, save for one thing-

He looked ready to kill.

“Took you fucking long enough,” he snarled. 

Quick as a whip, Lafayette backhanded John across the face so hard the crack was deafening. John’s head whipped to the side, and he worked his jaw carefully. 

Alex made a strangled sound of protest, jaw dropping. 

“Check?” Lafayette looked back at Alex, concern beneath the hard set of his jaw. 

“Canter…” Alex swallowed hard, unsure, and stayed where he was. 

“Oh so you fucking check in with him but not me? Newsflash asshole I’m the one you hit,” John spat. 

CRACK!

Alex was prepared for it this time. Still flinched at the force of Lafayette’s hand connecting with John’s other cheek. 

There was something about the way John was glaring up at Lafayette, the calm way Lafayette was staring down at John, the heavy tension in the air… 

“You have done this before. He has not. Did I tell you that you could speak?” Lafayette asked, voice mild. 

“You gonna make me stop?” John sassed back. 

CRACK! 

Alex could see John’s cheek burning from here, winced at the thought of how much his face would be smarting. Felt his stomach twist with heat at the way John’s chest heaved, the way his cock was filling out, the hooded anger in his eyes. 

Lafayette sighed. Scraped his hair back into a ponytail and secured it, every motion precise, calm. Such a contrast to John shaking with fury on the bed, all fire, all fight, looking like he was begging to be torn apart. 

“Give me your underwear Alexander,” Lafayette commanded. 

Alex blinked. Brought his hands to his belt, hesitant, unsure. 

Lafayette snapped his fingers. 

“Underwear. Now.”

“Yes sir,” Alex replied, not even realizing what he’d said until he had his breeches halfway down his legs. Froze, and stared up at Lafayette, felt something shift deep inside him at the way Lafayette was looking at him.

Lafayette grinned, and turned his attention back to John.

“You hear that Laurens? Look how good Alexander is being. Did you hear him? He addressed me properly without even having to be told. He is so good, so sweet, doing just as I asked. Why can’t you be good like that?” Lafayette’s voice was syrup sweet, words laced with disappointment, mocking. 

“Fuck you,” John spat, chin high.

Lafayette sighed, and slapped him again, hard. 

Alex finished undressing, kicked his breeches to the side, and tossed his balled up underwear to Lafayette, confused. 

“Shut up. Fucking useless, can’t even follow simple instructions you’ve been told a thousand times. Honestly, Laurens. Do you ever learn?” Lafayette’s snide tone, the way he wasn’t even really looking at John anymore, all of it… it made it hard to breathe. 

Alex watched as Lafayette popped open the trunk at the foot of the bed, pulled out a length of rope, and turned back to John. 

“Open your mouth John,” he spoke, deadly quiet, oh so serious.

Alex swallowed hard. Curled his fingers in the hem of his shirt just for something to hold onto. Felt transfixed, fascinated. 

“No, sir,” John sneered. 

Lafayette reached for John’s jaw, and John slapped his hand away. There was a scuffle, Lafayette fighting to get his hand on John’s jaw, John struggling away, until Lafayette simply grabbed him and threw him down on the bed, and landed on top of him with a knee planted in his chest, hand around John’s throat. 

John spat at Lafayette, and was slapped again for his trouble, the sound like a cracking whip through the air. 

Lafayette moved his hand from John’s neck to his jaw, gave John’s head a brisk shake, and squeezed until John was forced to open his mouth. 

Alex’s jaw dropped as he watched Lafayette stuff his underwear into John’s mouth, and deftly tied the rope around his head to keep it there. 

John was breathing hard through his nose, glaring up at Lafayette. 

“Hand me another length of rope, Alex, if you please,” Lafayette didn’t break his gaze from John as he spoke, hand petting down John’s throat as if considering something. 

“Steady,” Alex called out softly, but padded over to the chest anyways. 

John and Lafayette froze, looked over at him. 

“What is it, Alex? Are you alright?” Lafayette asked, voice suddenly soft and sweet. 

Alex didn’t miss the tremor that ran through John’s body at the change. 

“He can’t talk… how will he tell you if he needs to stop?” Alex asked, eyeing John as he fished out another length of rope from the chest. He trusted Lafayette, he knew how Lafayette loved John, cared for him, knew he wouldn’t hurt him, but… 

“He has a non-verbal safe cue. John, show Alex how you would tell me you need to stop?” Lafayette asked, his fingers looping loosely around John’s throat again. 

John hummed a four note tune. 

“Good.”

That tremor again, through John’s body at the sound of that simple word of praise. 

“And can you continue?” Lafayette asked. 

John tapped twice on Lafayette’s thigh with his fingers. 

“There. Alright, Alex?” Lafayette caught Alex’s gaze, gave him a soft smile, so contrary to his knee planted firmly in John’s chest, his fingers around his throat. 

“Canter,” Alex answered, and he handed Lafayette the rope. 

“Good. See John? See? Alexander is so sweet to check in for you, so kind to make sure you are alright. You will have to properly thank him later, when you have recovered the use of your mouth. What have you done to deserve such sweetness? Such kindness? I don’t think you deserved it at all, but perhaps our Alexander is kinder than me. Sit up now,” Lafayette shifted to let John up, and John just lay there and glared at him, wet sheen in his eyes, stubborn set to his jaw around the makeshift gag of Alex’s underwear. 

Alex stood at the side of the bed, fingers tangled in the hem of his shirt once again out of simple need to hold onto something, torn between intrigue and arousal, some deep seated desire he hadn’t known existed to see how far Lafayette could push John, what he could do to him before John broke apart, and the deeper seated need to protect him. 

When John didn’t move, Lafayette grabbed him by the arm and hauled him back upright. 

John didn’t fight so much as he simply didn’t cooperate, let his body go boneless and just slumped over despite Lafayette’s best attempts to get him sitting up again. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you? Useless, can’t even fucking sit up straight, it’s not that hard,” Lafayette grumbled. Finally, disgusted, he flung John face down on the bed instead, grabbed his wrists and hauled them behind his back, tied them there, John’s shoulders wrenched back, face in the sheets. 

“Oil, Alexander,” Lafayette held out a hand, his other hand palm down on John’s lower back, pressing him into the sheets. 

John squirmed, and received a stinging slap to his hip for his troubles. 

Quieted down and went still. 

Alex retrieved the oil from the bedside table and handed it to Lafayette, who set it down beside him. 

“There’s a leather paddle in the trunk, please Alexander,” Lafayette requested. 

Alex dug through the trunk, searching. Heard John squeal in a sound somewhere between pain and outrage. Resurfaced with the paddle in his hands to see Lafayette with two fingers deep inside John’s hole, a bored look on his face, and a fresh bite mark on John’s side. 

He passed the paddle to Lafayette, who stroked the flat side of it up over John’s cheek, so soft. He worked his fingers inside John, stretching him, teasing him. 

“You have been very bad, John, trying to sneak out on us when you know that we can help you. I am going to spank you with this paddle, I think… twenty five times. Does that sound fair?” Lafayette mused, fingers pumping in and out of John as if in an afterthought. 

John made a strangled sound in response that could have meant anything, but he made a rude gesture with one bound hand.

Alex couldn’t help but snicker. 

Lafayette shot him a glare, and swatted John’s hip with the paddle. 

“You are lucky I don’t have you tied up, Alexander. Don’t encourage John’s misbehaviour,” Lafayette snapped. 

Alex felt a thrill run through him at the suggestion, the idea of himself tied up, helpless under Lafayette’s hand… suddenly remembered the offhand suggestion Lafayette had made all those years ago in the woods, how the idea of being gagged with a glove and rendered helpless had stirred something unknown in him even then… 

Lafayette pulled his fingers out, stroked the edge of the paddle down John’s spine and dragged a soft, desperate whine from John’s throat. 

“There should be a leather cock cuff in there as well, Alexander. I believe I will cuff him. Boys who have been bad do not get to come-“

John’s desperate squeal interrupted Lafayette, and he received a light swat on the hip with the paddle.

“-then I will spank him, and you will count for me, Alexander, can you manage that?” Lafayette finished. 

Alex nodded, and dug through the trunk until he produced a small leather cuff, handed that to Lafayette too. 

“Good. Then I will fuck him, and then if he is good, perhaps I’ll let him come.” Lafayette kept stroking the edge of the paddle over John’s skin as he spoke, something about the slow motions mesmerizing, the way John’s body twitched and trembled beneath it, the ominous undertones beneath the light touches, the way John had suddenly gone quiet, just breathing, waiting, tense. 

Alex swallowed hard. Took a steadying breath. Waited. 

Lafayette took the paddle away, stripped out of his shirt and tossed it aside. He reached under John and fastened the cuff on, no sounds from John, no clue that he even realized it had happened except for a small shake of his head. 

“There is also a metal plug in there, please Alexander,” Lafayette requested. 

Alex looked in the trunk, pulled out a small, metal object, intricate designs on the base, tapered, rounded end, and offered it to Lafayette.

“This?” he asked, unsure. 

Lafayette nodded, accepted the plug with gentle fingers and slicked it up with oil. Pressed it to John’s hole and worked it gently inside John, who shuddered at the cold intrusion. The sight of the base of the plug, nestled between John’s cheeks and resting there, had Alex’s cock twitching in interest.

Lafayette put the back of his hand under John’s fingers. 

“Check?”

John’s fingers tapped twice. 

“Good. We begin.” 

The first smack of the paddle across John’s ass was gentle. 

“One,” Alex breathed, twitching as if it was he who’d been smacked. 

John didn’t move. 

The next three strokes of the paddle were predictable, steady in their pressure and strength, alternating cheeks. Alex counted, voice steady, each smack of leather against skin sending a jolt of heat right to his cock. He watched John closely, the slight tremble of his limbs, the ragged breath, couldn’t see his face. 

The fifth cracked down harder, right over the plug, driving it into John suddenly. 

“Five,” Alex’s voice was strangled, and John choked on a sob. 

It went on like that, the strokes of Lafayette’s paddle growing harder and more erratic, difficult to predict. Alex counted out loud, watched the skin of John’s backside and the backs of his thighs grow redder and redder. 

At fifteen, John started to cry. 

Lafayette only hit him harder, the crack of the paddle on skin making Alex wince with every stroke, voice wavering slightly, cock hard. 

By twenty, John was sobbing in earnest, whole body shaking, chest heaving against the sheets.

“Is he okay?” Alex asked softly.

“He knows what to do if he is not,” Lafayette responded. Hit him with his hardest stroke yet, right over the plug. 

John howled through his gag, fingernails digging into his palms. 

“Twenty one,” Alex counted. 

At twenty three, Alex crawled onto the bed and reached out, pet John’s head with a shaky hand. 

“Two more baby boy, you can do it, be strong now,” he whispered. 

“Do not touch him Alexander,” Lafayette reprimanded. 

Alex snatched his hand away, but stayed where he was, kneeling just out of John’s reach on the bed. 

John sobbed harder, and Lafayette delivered the twenty fourth stroke, light, almost gentle, knocked into the plug. 

“Twenty four,” Alex said, voice steady. 

Lafayette went still. 

No one moved, no sound in the room except for John’s sobs. Lafayette waited, arms folded, paddle in his hand, until John was whimpering, trembling, and Alex felt like he couldn’t breathe under the heavy weight of anticipation. 

John relaxed a fraction, and Lafayette’s arm came down hard, paddle landing right over the plug. 

“Twenty five,” Alex breathed out. 

Lafayette set the paddle down, stripped out of his breeches and kicked them aside. He stroked oil up his cock, worked the plug out of John’s ass and set it aside as well. His hands settled on John’s side as he came up onto the bed, thumb of his right hand digging into the purple bite mark on John’s side. 

Without a word, Lafayette drove his hips forwards, entered John with one rough thrust. 

He fucked him silently, roughly, as if John was anyone at all. 

Beside Alex, John shook and sobbed, seemed to have come all undone. 

Lafayette planted a hand between John’s shoulder blades, pushed him down, hips pistoning harder and faster, his head thrown back. 

Alex couldn’t tear his eyes away, the raw power of Lafayette’s body holding him spellbound, stark contrast to John’s helplessness. The sound of Lafayette’s hips slapping against John’s red, raw backside seemed defeaning in the otherwise quiet room, John’s sobs weak and quiet now, hands limp in their bindings. 

Lafayette pulled out suddenly, stroked himself hard and fast, and came without a sound, streaking John’s back and hands with thick ropes of come. 

John made a strangled, broken sound behind his gag. 

“I’m going to untie you, John. I want you to thank Alexander for his kindness to you,” Lafayette commanded. He undid the knot at the back of John’s head and held out his hand for John to spit Alex’s sodden underwear into. 

“Yes sir,” John whispered, voice hoarse, shaking. 

Lafayette worked the knot binding John’s hands free, tossed the rope aside. 

“Do a good job sucking his cock, and maybe we’ll let you come,” Lafayette delivered a stinging slap to John’s ass, made him whimper. 

Alex shifted to sit at the head of the bed, legs dropping open so John could crawl up between them on shaking limbs. He slid his hands behind his back, knew he wouldn’t be able to resist touching John if he didn’t, and knew Lafayette was watching closely. 

“Thank you, Alex,” John whispered. He took Alex’s cock in his hand, stroked his tongue across the head and whined pitifully when Alex moaned. 

Alex curled his fingers into fists behind his back, wanted so badly to touch as John slid his mouth slowly down his length, enveloping his cock in silky wet heat. Slow, sweet. Alex arched his head back, resisted the urge to drive his hips up into that slick heat. John seemed so delicate, trembling and still crying. 

He pulled back off, lips tight, and laved his tongue over the head of Alex’s cock, teasing, almost dainty. 

“Fuck, baby boy, your mouth is amazing, that tongue…” Alex groaned, couldn’t resist pushing his hips up just a touch. 

Lafayette huffed, impatient. Came across the bed and grabbed John by his braid. 

“Don’t act like you have never done this before. Must I do everything for you?” He snapped. 

Alex opened his mouth to protest, and all that came out was a loud moan as Lafayette used his hand to propel John’s head up and down, wet glide of John’s mouth on his cock. 

John made a strangled sound, but sucked, cheeks hollow, tongue lapping at the underside of Alex’s cock as best he could with Lafayette’s hand controlling his motion. 

Lafayette pushed John’s head down roughly, made him choke and gag, and Alex couldn’t help but moan, orgasm growing closer and closer as Lafayette worked John’s head up and down, fingers tight in his braid. 

Lafayette leaned in, caught Alex in an open mouthed kiss. 

Alex moaned into his mouth, muffled, and kissed him back, let Lafayette drive his tongue into his mouth and take control of the kiss, rough and possessive. 

Lafayette’s free hand came up to rest on Alex’s chest, fingers finding his nipple and worrying at it teasingly. 

Alex whined, tried to pull back so he could warn John that he was about to come, but then Lafayette pinched his nipple sharply, and leaned into the kiss so Alex’s head was against the headboard and he couldn’t go anywhere, and John flickered his tongue over the head of Alex’s cock and he was gone, moaning loudly as he pumped John’s mouth full of come. 

Lafayette pushed John’s head down. Held him there while he worked his throat, tried to swallow with his mouth and throat full of Alex’s cock. 

Finally, he let go. Pulled back from kissing Alex, watched as John pulled off, chin wet with come and drool, cheeks wet with tears. 

John went limp, sagged against the mattress with his head on Alex’s thigh, crying softly. 

“I don’t think we should let you come,” Lafayette mused, looking down at John with a displeased expression on his face. “I had to help you suck Alexander’s cock, you couldn’t even do that right…”

Alex’s breath caught in his throat, and John let out a sob of despair, clinging to Alex’s thigh. 

“Please, please,” he whimpered, hips rutting weakly against the sheets. 

“Shut up, I did not give you permission to speak.” Lafayette chided. He looked at Alex, gaze even, brow raised in a silent query. 

“Please, Laf, let him come? He took his spankings so well, I think he’s earned it…” Alex suggested. He shifted, freed his hands from behind his back and petted John’s head gently, eyes never leaving Lafayette’s face. 

Lafayette sighed. 

“Alright, fine.” He stood up from the bed. “John you are lucky Alexander is so kind. Do what you must, then, Alexander.” Dismissive, almost flippant, like Alex and John both had let him down. 

Alex nudged John over onto his back, kissed him lightly. 

“Don’t cry sweetheart. I’ve got you. Gonna suck your hard cock, make you come, s’gonna feel so good, yeah?” He kissed down John’s chest. Kissed the bite mark in his side. 

“Yeah, yeah,” John babbled, shaking hands threading into Alex’s hair. 

Alex undid the cock cuff, pulled it off and set it aside, and John practically deflated with a whimper of relief. 

“Easy, easy baby, I’ve got you. Look at your hard cock, so full, already dripping and I haven’t touched you yet, oh my love,” Alex curled his hand around the base of John’s cock, stroked his tongue from base to tip. 

John’s hips bucked and he cried out wordlessly. 

Alex lapped precome from the tip of John’s cock, and swallowed him in one smooth motion. 

“Alex!” John tugged at his hair, hips bucking up.

Alex moaned softly in encouragement, let John fuck his mouth with weak, shallow thrusts. He stroked John’s thigh gently, mouth tight around John’s cock. 

It didn’t take long before John was coming hard, his hips bucking up hard into Alex’s throat, wordless cry from his lips as he flooded Alex’s mouth and throat with come. 

Alex swallowed around him, pulled off and licked him clean with gentle sweeps of his tongue. 

As soon as he let him go, John curled over onto his side, pulled his knees up to his chest and sobbed like his heart had been broken. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay John!” Alex scrambled back up the bed, gathered John into his arms and held him close. 

John melted against Alex, buried his face in his neck and sobbed his heart out. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he sobbed, over and over again. 

“Hey, hey, shhh, it’s alright baby, it’s okay, we love you so much, we want to help you, all you gotta do is ask,” Alex whispered. He stroked John’s hair, kissed his temple. 

“You did so well John, I’m so proud of you.” Lafayette’s voice, so different from only moments before, soft and warm and full of love. 

Alex twisted to look up at him, took in Lafayette’s soft smile, the relaxed lines of his body, no worry present anywhere despite John’s wracking sobs, and he relaxed too, turned back to John and nudged at John’s head until he could kiss him, soft and gentle. 

“The bath is ready, John, let’s get you all clean? My brave boy, my sweet boy, let us look after you,” Lafayette murmured as he reached for John. 

Alex pulled back, let Lafayette lift John up and carry him to the bath. Watched them settle in the warm water together, bubbles high and soothing with lavender and camomile oils. Sat up on the edge of the bed and sat on his hands, unsure what to do now. 

Lafayette cradled John close, tucked against his chest, murmuring low and sweet in his ear as his sobs slowed and quieted. He looked up, met Alex’s gaze and smiled softly. Whispered something in John’s ear. 

John looked up, sniffled, his face streaked with tears. Reached out towards Alex with both hands, his lip trembling. 

Alex stood up too, stepped into the large tub and settled in the water, leaned in to kiss John, slow and sweet. 

“What do you need baby boy?” 

“Wash me?” John asked, voice calmer, tears halted. 

“Anything, John, anything,” Alex replied. He grabbed the soft washcloth from the small table beside the tub, dipped it in the water. Cupped John’s chin in his hand and carefully washed away the tears and come. Kissed John’s nose. Let the cozy feeling of warmth and love rush up over him and breathed into it. Comfortable. Happy.

"How do you feel?" he asked, voice soft. Punctuated the question with a kiss to John's forehead. 

"Better," John whispered back, a little woozy, a little drunk on emotion and relief. 

"Good," Alex smiled, washed down John's chest gently, thought maybe he understood it now.


End file.
